Here are three examples of standard upright marble VA military grave markers that you might find in national or private cemeteries. These measure approximately 42″ x 13″ x 3″. Some of the newer ones are made of granite. Many have an optional religious symbol at the top of the marker (like the cross in the example at right). For a list of these see the Veterans Affairs website: Emblems of Belief on Government Headstones and Markers.
The two examples below are for pre-World War I grave markers. On the left is the headstone for the infamous cannibal, Alfred Packer, who was a Union Civil War veteran. On the right is one for a Spanish American War veteran. Note the way the name and regiment are enclosed in a shield on both of these markers – this was used for Union Civil War and Spanish American War soldiers. Some Confederate Civil War veterans have a symbol of the Southern Cross of Honor on their grave markers.
For help finding military records and indexes online see: Military Records and Indexes on the Internet, which includes some listings for Civil War cemetery burials.
Photos: Alfred Packer’s grave marker is from Littleton Cemetery, Littleton, Colorado; the other two are from Fort Logan National Cemetery, Denver, Colorado.